"You can't steal second base with your foot on first."
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"There are three things that can destroy a preacher, the glory, the gold, and the girls."
"Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition."
"When pleasure interferes with business, give up business."
"Maternity is a matter of fact, paternity is a matter of opinion."
"A man who has both feet planted firmly in the air can be safely called a liberal."
"Those who sleep with dogs gets up with fleas."
"You must not enthrone ignorance just because there is much of it."
"The wicked work harder to preach hell than the righteous do to get to heaven."
"A malignant sore throat is a danger, a malignant throat not sore is worse."
"All is fair in love and golf."
"Smith and Wesson or a Colt always beat four aces."
"Nobody has ever bet enough on a winning horse."
"What is an expert? Someone who is twenty miles from home."
"The love of evil is the root of all money."
"Of two evils, it is always best to vote for the least hypocritical."
"You cannot have all chiefs; you gotta have Indians too."
"The only thing we learn from new elections is we learned nothing from the old."
"If your time ain't come not even a doctor can kill you."
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