"Marriage is one long conversation, checkered by disputes."
Submitted by Quonation
"We love in others what we lack in ourselves, and would be everything, but what we are."
"Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first."
"Love is blind -- marriage is the eye-opener."
"Marriage is an institution, but who wants to live in an institution?"
"A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it."
"Marriage is like a violin. After the music is over, you still have the strings."
"Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot."
"Any man who married for money and got it. Earned it."
"He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job."
"If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers."
"Marital Freedom: The liberty that allows a husband to do exactly that which his wife pleases."
"Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering."
"No man was ever shot by his wife while doing the dishes."
"The man who says his wife can't take a joke forgets that she took him."
"Marriage isn't a word... it's a sentence."
"Every marriage tends to consist of an aristocrat and a peasant. Of a teacher and a learner."
"I've been married so long, I am on my third bottle of Tabasco sauce."
"A marriage is no amusement but a solemn act, and generally a sad one."
"Being married gives one one's position like nothing else can."
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