Erma Bombeck Quote
Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Christmas
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“There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Christmas
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“There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Humor
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“When humor goes, there goes civilization.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Humor
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“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me’.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Life
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“Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Family
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“I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Family
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“If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Sports
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“It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Courage
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“I am not a glutton — I am an explorer of food.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Control
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“Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It’s literary suicide.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Comedy
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“Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Children
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“It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Children
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“Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Success
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“Never accept a drink from a Urologist.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Alcohol
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“The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Exercise
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“Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.”

Erma Bombeck
Submitted by Quonation |Category: Health Care